How do I explain how the last week has been for me? My life has been a complete nightmare for the past 9 months. I have cried more than I have ever in my entire 37 years. I have never been so angry and hurt. I have met all of my demons and never thought I would conquer any of them until this week.
I found out that he had lied to me once again and didn't do what he said he was going to do. Big surprise there! I had to see a look of despair on my 6yr old son's face because he knew something that he didn't want to tell me because he thought it would make me upset. All because my jerk of an ex could not be man enough to talk to me. He is still being a selfish ass. I confronted him on it via email and of course didn't like what I read. As I am reading his email I thought there goes my really great mood but to my surprise, my great mood did not go away. I did not cry. I did not get angry. WOW!! I told a friend of mine the story and she says to me, "Vanessa, I think you just hit a milestone, you are over him!" She was right. I felt like the weight of the last 9 months had been lifted away and the dark cloud above my head was gone and the sun was shining. I WAS HAPPY!
I know that moving out of the house we bought together and getting a place for just me and the boys had alot to do with me being able to come to this place I am at and also doing all the things that were always done for me. I feel a sense of power and accomplishment. I know I have some more milestones to cross but BRING IT ON!! :)
I am not scared anymore.
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